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Petty Instagram captions are a great way to add a touch of sass and attitude to your photos. They can be used to express your feelings, show off your personality, or simply add a bit of humor to your posts. Whether you’re trying to shade your ex, show off your new haircut, or just show off your sense of humor, a petty caption can help you do it.
Some popular types of petty captions include shade captions, which are used to throw shade at someone or something, and clap back captions, which are used to respond to a diss or a slight. Other types of captions include motivational captions, which are used to inspire and uplift, and funny captions, which are used to make people laugh.
When it comes to crafting the perfect petty caption, it’s important to think about the tone of your post, as well as the audience you’re trying to reach. For example, if you’re trying to throw shade at your ex, a more direct and straightforward caption might be more effective, while if you’re trying to make a funny post, a more lighthearted and playful caption might be more appropriate.
No matter what type of caption you choose, it’s important to remember that a good caption can help elevate your post and make it more engaging and memorable. So, whether you’re trying to shade your ex, show off your sense of humor, or simply express your feelings, a petty Instagram caption can help you do it.

Petty Instagram captions for Selfies
- “Feeling myself and not taking any prisoners.”
- “I woke up like this, and I’m not mad about it.”
- “I’m not always the center of attention, but when I am, I own it.”
- “I’m not a morning person, but this selfie is worth it.”
- “I’m not a model, but I can pose like one.”
- “I’m not a professional, but I play one on Instagram.”
- “I’m not always fabulous, but when I am, I take a selfie.”
- “I’m not always picture perfect, but I’m always Instagram ready.”
- “I’m not always camera ready, but when I am, I make it count.”
- “I’m not always the life of the party, but when I am, I make sure to document it.”
- “I’m not always the star of the show, but when I am, I make sure to snap a pic.”
- “I’m not always the belle of the ball, but when I am, I strike a pose.”
- “I’m not always the queen of the castle, but when I am, I reign supreme.”
- “I’m not always the boss, but when I am, I make sure to let everyone know.”
- “I’m not always the center of the universe, but when I am, I shine bright.”
- “I’m not always on top of the world, but when I am, I make sure to capture the view.”
- “I’m not always the star player, but when I am, I score big.”
- “I’m not always the headliner, but when I am, I steal the show.”
- “I’m not always the leading lady, but when I am, I make it count.”
- “I’m not always the main attraction, but when I am, I make sure to make an entrance.”
Short petty Instagram captions
- “Bye, Felicia”
- “You can’t sit with us”
- “I’m not bitter, just better”
- “Sorry, not sorry”
- “Haters gonna hate”
- “I’m the real MVP”
- “I’m not a backup plan, and definitely not a second choice”
- “I’m not a option, I’m a priority”
- “I have no time for fake people”
- “I’m not the one you want to mess with”
- “Facts only”
- “I’m not a follower, I’m a leader”
- “I’m not a second place, I’m a winner”
- “I have no time for negativity”
- “I’m not the average, I’m the exception”
- “I’m not a backup plan, I’m a main event”
- “I’m not afraid of change, I embrace it”
- “I’m not a sidekick, I’m the main attraction”
- “I’m not a runner-up, I’m a champion”
- “I’m not a second choice, I’m the one and only”
Petty Baddie captions
- “Feeling myself, one outfit at a time”
- “I’m not arrogant, I’m just better than you”
- “Don’t let yesterday take up too much of today”
- “I’m not a morning person, I’m a coffee person”
- “I’m not a model, I’m just really good at posing”
- “I’m not high maintenance, I’m just worth it”
- “I don’t need a filter, I’m naturally flawless”
- “I’m not a boss, I’m a boss lady”
- “I’m not a queen, I’m a goddess”
- “I’m not a trendsetter, I am the trend”
- “I’m not a diva, I’m just confident”
- “I’m not a fashion victim, I’m a fashion icon”
- “I’m not a perfectionist, I’m just detail oriented”
- “I’m not a control freak, I’m just in charge”
- “I’m not bossy, I’m the boss”
- “I’m not a drama queen, I’m just passionate”
- “I’m not a show-off, I’m just proud of myself”
- “I’m not a snob, I’m just selective”
- “I’m not a perfectionist, I’m just extremely detail-oriented”
- “I’m not a diva, I’m just the best.”
Petty Instagram captions for guys
- “I’m the king of my own castle”
- “I’m not the one you want to mess with”
- “I’m not a sidekick, I’m the main attraction”
- “I’m not a follower, I’m a leader”
- “I’m not a second place, I’m a winner”
- “I have no time for fake people”
- “I’m not a backup plan, I’m a main event”
- “I’m the real MVP”
- “I’m not a option, I’m a priority”
- “I’m not afraid of change, I embrace it”
- “I’m the boss of my own life”
- “I have no time for negativity”
- “I’m not a second choice, I’m the one and only”
- “I’m not the average, I’m the exception”
- “I’m not a runner-up, I’m a champion”
- “I’m not a backup plan, and definitely not a second choice”
- “I’m not bitter, just better”
- “I’m not the one to underestimate”
- “I’m not the one you want to cross”
- “I’m not the one to mess with”
Petty instagram captions for haters
- “Haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate”
- “I don’t have time for negativity, I’m too busy shining”
- “I’m not bothered by haters, they’re just fans in denial”
- “I’m not a fan of drama, but haters seem to bring it out in me”
- “I don’t need validation from haters, I’ve already got my own”
- “Haters are like crickets, they make noise but I’m not listening”
- “Haters are just unhappy people who want to bring you down”
- “I don’t need to prove myself to haters, they’ll see it eventually”
- “I don’t let haters get to me, they’re just not worth my energy”
- “I’m not a fan of drama, but haters seem to bring it out in me”
- “Haters gonna hate, but I’m gonna keep shining”
- “I don’t pay attention to haters, they’re just background noise”
- “Haters are just lost fans, they’re just not ready to admit it yet”
- “I don’t need haters, I’ve got plenty of love from my supporters”
- “I don’t let haters bring me down, I rise above”
- “Haters are just a reminder that I’m doing something right”
- “I don’t need haters, I’ve got my own back”
- “Haters are just a part of the journey, I choose to rise above”
- “I don’t let haters dim my light, I shine brighter for them.”
Petty instagram captions for fake friends
- “Fake friends are like shadows, they’re always there in your darkest times, but disappear in the light.”
- “I’m not a fan of the fairweather friends.”
- “I don’t need a big circle, just a few real ones.”
- “I don’t have time for people who only come around when they need something.”
- “I’m surrounded by love, not fake friends.”
- “I don’t need a lot of friends, just a few real ones.”
- “I don’t have time for people who only show up when it’s convenient for them.”
- “I’m not interested in keeping company with people who are only around when it’s easy.”
- “I prefer quality over quantity when it comes to friends.”
- “I’m not a fan of fair-weather friends, who only stick around when the sun is shining.”
- “I choose my friends wisely, fake ones are not welcomed”
- “I’m not a fan of people who are only around when things are going well.”
- “I’m not interested in keeping company with people who are only around when it’s easy.”
- “I don’t have time for people who are only friends when it’s convenient for them.”
- “I prefer real friends over fair-weather ones.”
- “I don’t need a lot of friends, just a few genuine ones.”
- “I don’t keep company with people who are only around when it’s easy.”
- “I’m not a fan of fake friends, they’re always there when it’s easy and disappear when it’s tough”
- “I’m not interested in keeping company with people who are only around when it’s convenient for them.”
- “I prefer real friends, not the ones who are just pretending to be friends.”
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FAQs for Petty instagram captions
What are petty Instagram captions?
Petty Instagram captions are short, snarky or sassy phrases or statements that are used to add a bit of attitude or humor to an Instagram post.
How do I come up with a petty caption for my Instagram post?
You can come up with a petty caption for your Instagram post by thinking about your post’s content and the message you want to convey. Try to be creative and use puns, wordplay, or clever references.
Can I use petty captions on professional or business Instagram accounts?
It is not recommended to use petty captions on professional or business Instagram accounts as they may come across as unprofessional or inappropriate. It’s best to stick to captions that are informative, engaging, and on-brand.
You can use hashtags that are relevant to your post’s content and your audience. For example, if your post is about a new product or service, you can use hashtags that are specific to that product or service.